Blog of the month - March 2008

C'est la vie ... a running update of the Massons

My husband and I moved to Lyon (second city in France and gastronomical capital of the world) three years ago. Currently we’re at our half-way mark, which means I can see the finish line and know we’re going to make it, but at the same time feel myself wishing for more time to enjoy the things we love here.

Have you ever lived abroad before?

We actually met while working in West Africa on a public health team. (See www.kariborders.blogspot.com). So an Iowa boy met a Georgia girl in Senegal, got married and then moved to Lyon.

I grew up in West Africa and returned there after college, so for me ‘living abroad’ meant tropical fruit, horse carts, power outages and djembe drums. I’ve lived overseas half of my life, but France was a whole new spin on things.

When did you decide to live in France?

I did not.  My husband had been accepted to medical school here in Lyon before we got engaged. So it was a package deal of sorts: get married to him + move to France. To be honest, moving to Europe had never appealed to me. But what can I say? I love him, so there was no question. Living here has been surprisingly good way to start our marriage. When we moved we had no friends or family nearby – so we had to get along! Plus we were able to go through the culture shock and really hard transitions together.

What do you like the most about it?

The markets - every Tuesday and Thursday mornings, right on our street. Bring a basket and some euros one day and I’ll show you around.

Any culture shock ?

Personally, I think "culture shock" is a misnomer. When you think of a shock, it's something that strikes in an instant. In my experience, culture shock is more something that eats away at you. Bite by bite. Gnawing slowly at your defenses until you find yourself crying on the floor because the phone bill arrived...and it's in French!!

It really has nothing to do with France or the French. It has everything to do with being outside of my own culture for an extended period of time. It has to do with feeling like everything I do, every interaction with people, I make a mistake. I say the wrong word. I forget to give the bisous (cheek kiss). I don't remember to greet the store owner as I walk in the door. I feel tears come up just thinking about my mom, and thinking about my dad pushes them overflow. I don't know how to fill out our tax forms according to French law. And I certainly don't feel like looking it up on some website in French, or making a phone call that costs 40 cents/minute to talk to some person speaking 40 kilometer-per-hour French.

Again, it really has nothing to do with France or the French. We have made some wonderful French friends, and found the negative stereotypes of the French to be quite inaccurate. It's just part of living outside of your own culture. Fortunately, my husband balances me out...and can pick me up off the floor if I need it.

Do you miss anything from your homeland?

The three Fs: Family. Friends. Food.

We also miss being on autopilot. In the U.S. we know how things work, what's expected of us, and how to get what we need. Living in a new culture makes you feel like a five-year old. You have to re-learn everything you already know, like what kind of cheese to buy, how much it should weigh in grams, how much it should cost, and how to write a check to pay for it. That's just one example. Don't get me started on how to pay bills in French!

When did you start your blog?

I started blogging in Senegal, then created our current blog when we moved here. It’s such a convenient way to combine keeping in touch, venting and scrap-booking into one neat little package.

I’d say it’s evolved a bit. I try to include things I’ve learned (French CVs require a photo and where to buy the best barbecue sauce) for others who are moving here. (See www.lyon-eats.blogspot.com) It can be a difficult transition, but hopefully it’s an encouragement and source of information for someone who needs it.

Did you make new friends with your blog?

Yes! It’s unreal how many people I’ve connected with through our blogs. Some of them are in similar situations and others aren’t – but we still have fun getting to know each other. We actually met up a couple recently whom we had ‘met’ in the blogosphere first.

Why did you register on expat-blog.com?

I wanted to find more people like me.  Even after half a life overseas, it’s still encouraging (and funny!) to read others’ stories and learn from them. I had registered with several similar sites, but have found that expat-blog has the most of what I’m after.

C'est la vie ... a running update of the Massons

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