Your experience of culture shock in Ecuador

An63680 wrote:

It was dissapointed in my neighbors when they told me never to trust my wife, and since that day they will not speak to her or even acknowledge her presents,   Robert

I was afraid that's what you meant

i´m sorry but i just don´t understand where all of this is coming from.somebody said something of race,somebody said something of a womanizer.the only thing i said of anything is there is no respect and no politeness that i´ve encountered for over 6 months living here with my wonderful wife

gringuito,

I think there was some confusion over the post, and perhaps not taken as written. I don't think anyone is trying to attack you, I think maybe if you re=read the original post you made, and offered more information that may make things clearer for some folks.

Welcome aboard, and don't give up quite yet.

GMC 

Sometimes threads get off point, and I think this one has several times, and I know I participated.

The irony is that I think this topic is a great one and worthy of discussion. However, when I go look back at my first post, I realized I only discussed what I loved about the Ecuadorian experience. So, now I will answer correctly:

My experience of culture shock here has not been very negative, but I think it's because I stay away from most extranjeros. Many people come here from never having lived outside their home country before...and they have a limited ability in understanding that it isn't Ecuador's responsibility or desire to change for them. They must change for Ecuador - or live surrounded by others who also refuse to appreciate and learn from their new experience.

Yes, getting anything done that requires the government is a bit of a pain in comparison to where many of us came from - but that pain pales in comparison to the beauty, tranquility and opportunities we now have to open both our minds and our hearts.

So, my "culture shock" is sourced from my inability to understand those who come here and who seem unable and/or unwilling to let themselves enjoy themselves.

gringuito wrote:

i´m sorry but i just don´t understand where all of this is coming from.somebody said something of race,somebody said something of a womanizer.the only thing i said of anything is there is no respect and no politeness that i´ve encountered for over 6 months living here with my wonderful wife

Review your words. To me, your statements were really ugly. I don't know the neighborhood you live in, but you made it sound like all Ecuadorians were awful people.

yes the racism,  is toward  my wife, the  five light skied Ecuadorians, we're giving me a warning, they were sure it was for my own benefit,  I really  don't  want to elaborate on this sad fact anymore,  Robert

then i hope you´re living in a wonderful make believe life.because that´s what you´re living in.so such a simple task as being respectful,so easy it is to be polite to another but it seems like it hurts for someone here to do that.i want mine,it´s me first.it seems like the expats are living here in make believe and don´t experience what i´ve encountered.i guess it´s because i´m an old,short gringo,67 years old lived in many other worse off countries(vietnam,thailand,mexico,libya)but the times have changed.and it hasn´t gotten better but worse.people look into the between lines to satisfy their own reasons or excuses for this or that.i´m just stating the facts i´ve encountered from the peo0ple(ecuadorians)i´ve encountered all of professionalism,the in between and the below of which factor is what you think is below of the affore mentioned.i´ve encountered them all.i will live here with my wonderful ecuadorian wife in guayaquil and if you´re life has been better than my encounters then i am certainly happy for you.i hope your life here will be an eternal paradise.

An63680 wrote:

yes the racism,  is toward  my wife, the  five light skied Ecuadorians, we're giving me a warning, they were sure it was for my own benefit,  I really  don't  want to elaborate on this sad fact anymore,  Robert

I see quite a bit of this coming from my wife's family. They are afraid of black and indigenous people. It's a bit different from the stereotypes and racism in the US. Not so much a contempt, but abject fear of black Ecuadorians and the belief that the indigenous people will trick or cheat them. My Ecuadorian wife is much more progressive in her racial attitudes, but her parents are pretty well set in their ways.

gringuito wrote:

then i hope you´re living in a wonderful make believe life.because that´s what you´re living in.so such a simple task as being respectful,so easy it is to be polite to another but it seems like it hurts for someone here to do that.i want mine,it´s me first.it seems like the expats are living here in make believe and don´t experience what i´ve encountered.i guess it´s because i´m an old,short gringo,67 years old lived in many other worse off countries(vietnam,thailand,mexico,libya)but the times have changed.and it hasn´t gotten better but worse.people look into the between lines to satisfy their own reasons or excuses for this or that.i´m just stating the facts i´ve encountered from the peo0ple(ecuadorians)i´ve encountered all of professionalism,the in between and the below of which factor is what you think is below of the affore mentioned.i´ve encountered them all.i will live here with my wonderful ecuadorian wife in guayaquil and if you´re life has been better than my encounters then i am certainly happy for you.i hope your life here will be an eternal paradise.

You might want to move to a different location in Ecuador.

you need to go to the sierras and meditate.perhaps that will give you a better understanding of who and what we are.good luck in finding the true answers

when i said inbred didn´t have anything to do with race.it was the ¨culture¨of people being polite and respectful to others.inbred means nothing of color,nor sexism,nor separatism of 1 from the other.i did re-read what i wrote.figure some way for the people of this country to clean after themselves of the streets and housing and truly they will open their eyes to beauty

good for you.i´m happy for you.deal with it

mugtech wrote:

gringuito wrote:

then i hope you´re living in a wonderful make believe life.because that´s what you´re living in.so such a simple task as being respectful,so easy it is to be polite to another but it seems like it hurts for someone here to do that.i want mine,it´s me first.it seems like the expats are living here in make believe and don´t experience what i´ve encountered.i guess it´s because i´m an old,short gringo,67 years old lived in many other worse off countries(vietnam,thailand,mexico,libya)but the times have changed.and it hasn´t gotten better but worse.people look into the between lines to satisfy their own reasons or excuses for this or that.i´m just stating the facts i´ve encountered from the peo0ple(ecuadorians)i´ve encountered all of professionalism,the in between and the below of which factor is what you think is below of the affore mentioned.i´ve encountered them all.i will live here with my wonderful ecuadorian wife in guayaquil and if you´re life has been better than my encounters then i am certainly happy for you.i hope your life here will be an eternal paradise.

You might want to move to a different location in Ecuador.

Or better yet, outside Ecuador. You'd like Prague, Gringito. Super orderly lines, very organized.

Interestingly, it is often said here in Vilcabamba that the best workers are the indigenous people.

I honestly think the attitude here in Vilcabamba isn't like that of those who fear the indigenous. Poverty has had its benefits in the ways of the heart.

Susan F. wrote:

Interestingly, it is often said here in Vilcabamba that the best workers are the indigenous people.

I honestly think the attitude here in Vilcabamba isn't like that of those who fear the indigenous. Poverty has had its benefits in the ways of the heart.

I purchased land from a indigenous couple from the Awa nation. They were honest, friendly, and amazingly helpful. Even after the deal was closed and they could have just gone off with their $ and ignored me, they visited the property, helped me determine the boundaries, and clear a trail. They were wonderful people.

and you sir are ¨like another brick in the wall¨¨the next time you let another person get in front of you or treats you with disrespect just tell them thank you i hope you have a nice day and move on with the next person who does it.just to be frank once it´s started it never ends.it doesn´t matter what country you live.isn´t life great?

I live in Guayaquil now off and on for over 3 years and have not noticed racism……that is my experience and my wife and her Ecuadorian family show none…….almost all of the people are nice and helpful……..compared to the USSA, where it seems not a day goes by without encountering some a..hole……..
Vaya con Dios

it seems like your concourses out of the famiyl haven´t encountered what i have.if you have not encountered anything i´ve wriiten you´re just a great guy.keep up the good work

Hello guys,

can we please concentrate on the original topic ?

Many thanks,

julien

Hi everybody,

Just to inform you that some irrelevant posts have been removed from this thread.

We are here only to discuss on our experience of culture shock in Ecuador.

Thank you,

Priscilla

Thanks for keeping us in line, Priscilla.

When I return home to El Centro from my weekly trip to Megamaxi supermarket in north Quito, I always have the taxi driver use the Avenida Eloy Alfaro route.  (Sometimes mispronounced by Gringos as Elroy Alfaro. )

On the first part of that route in the north part of town, Eloy Alfaro has many upscale restaurants and nightspots and the famous Honey & Honey bakery.  As the route approaches Parque la Carolina, it becomes what I affectionately call the "Via de Vendedores" -- vendors way.

Navigating right in the middle of the avenue during daylight hours are dozens of vendors, spaced apart, selling everything from mandarin oranges -- 10 for a dollar -- to bottles of water ... to eyeware.

Stopped for a minute at a traffic light while in the passenger seat, I was approached by a vendor selling pairs of sunglasses.  He held up a sample for me.  As usual, I was wearing my own sunglasses at the time.

As he reached the stationary taxi, I pointed to my sunglasses and said to the vendor, "Quisiera venderte estos por doce dolares.   Son plásticos pero son excelentes."  I'd like to sell you these for 12 dollars.  They're made of plastic but they're excellent.

He was clearly uninterested in buying my used pair and continued to show me his favored sample pair.  How much for those?, I asked. 

He wanted $20.  That's a lot for a street sale of sunglasses in Quito.

I turned to the taxista sitting next to me and asked, "¿Está cuerdo?"  Is he sane?

The glasses had leather finishings.  Thinking I was trying to ask 'Is it leather?', the taxi man answered, "Si, es cuero" -- Yes, it's leather.

Rather than try to parse the words cuerdo and cuero, I simply said, "El vendedor está cuerdo, pero su precio es loco."  The vendor is sane, but his price is crazy.

At this point, the traffic light turned green and we drove off.  I told the taxista that $20 was the most I had ever been asked to pay for sunglasses by a vendor in Ecuador.

"Precio extranjero," he explained.  Gringo pricing.

cccmedia in Quito

I agree that there are some Ecuadorians especially in Guayaquil who are rude but not all people from Guayaquil are that way.  I have had some experiences that were silly such as when the cleaning women showed up for work wearing my daughters missing clothes and hair ties.  I understand that some people live below the poverty line here, however stealing from your employer is just not acceptable. Overall my experience has been a positive one the food is great and for the most part everyone I have met personally had been very friendly. Although it is true that when using public restrooms you should carry your own paper.

Culture shock, what culture shock ? I have traveled around the world and someone else said it before me, the only culture shock  experienced was living in America. A salesman from Brazil told me before coming to Ecuador, "use a lot of gracias and Buenos Dias". He was right, it's all about courtesy. Make friends and not just other gringos. If you like doing business with a local mom and pop, frequent that business and get to know the owners as it will pay off big time in the future. A local tienda carries grande bottles of Brahma just for me and gives me the case price even though I am picking up only six at a time. Learn the language so you can give directions to the taxi driver, they really appreciate your effort.
If I was shocked about anything it is the fact that you are treated as an equal by everyone and especially the government. You are entitled to all the privileges and benefits afforded citizens in this country. I am shocked that seniors are not expected to pay sales tax or that we can go to the front of the line at the bank or that young people will give up their seat on the bus and that the government provides free health care with no deductibles or strings attached. My friend had his hip replaced two months ago. Total cost for xrays, surgery, physical therapy, etc. zero, zip, nada ! Yes he had to wait three months for a turno but he saved a minimum of $12.000.00 US.

Carrying one's own toilet paper is actually a common thing in most of Latin America, all of Asia, the MidEast and Africa...

I agree,

I carry almost identical items in my "Just in Case" bag here as I did in the U.S. Toilet paper was always in the top 10. Each vehicle had a bag, some things were added or subtracted depending on time of the year.

I found you seldom could go wrong by having a small amount of the important things no matter the weather, or where you were.

My dear Gringuito, I don't know where you are living, but I have been to Guayaquil, Manta, Salinas, Montanita, Machalilla, Los Frailles Beach, Manglaralto, Olon, Libertad and Puerto Lopez.  With few exceptions I have been treated as courteously as any town in the US (only more so) by taxi drivers, bus drivers, optical office, government offices in both Guayaquil and Manta, and several hotels and restaurants.  I have not visited the larger cities like Quito or Cuenca but hope to do so in the future.  I always carry my own TP but have rarely had to use it and found most of the bathrooms, even those at gas stations quite acceptable.  I hope your experience and your post does not discourage others from visiting this country as there are many good things to experience and explore.  I have been treated worse in large airports, like in San Diego for example, than I have ever experienced here.....entonces....habla espanol usted?

I have had to adjust to the plodding, paperwork-laden bureaucracy.

After gathering documents that had to be sent to me from Pennsylvania -- including a certified driving record and an apostile validating it for international use -- and documents from various agencies in Quito, I went to the 'DMV' headquarters last Friday to take the big off-road exam and get the Ecuadorian drivers license.

Although my papers were in order, the agent told me to come back Monday for unexpected medical review.

On Monday, the agency medical reviewer told me I had to go to my Quito doctor and get a document stating that it would be OK for me to drive at night.

In my case this will mean blood testing -- not expensive in Ecuador -- and a total so far of four additional trips that I did not anticípate last week.

Over the years in the U.S., I was always able to get a drivers license with only one trip to various states' DMVs.

cccmedia in Quito

Dear ccmedia, I applaud your persistence in getting your license and agree things are often more difficult than seem necessary when it comes to *privileges* here.  But I am thinking that rather than needing a medical clearance one should have a drug clearance to drive here at night, cause they must be HIGH to want to....LOL...j.k.....but seriously, the only objection I have to this whole experience is that these otherwise sweet people seem to have a death wish the moment they get behind a wheel--includes most bus drivers and taxi drivers.  I now know why everyone makes the sign of the cross while being transported!  I would not drive here at night if they gave me the license....and the car!!  I admire your grit.

pareeves, most taxi and bus drivers have to keep a very tight schedule or they might lose their job. I am pretty sure that is what makes them take so many chances...

Yes, the paperwork here defies logic. Strangely enough, it was the same way in Kuwait when I lived there. However, they said they had a reason for it. Their reasoning was that they had to keep their citizens employed, so they made sure that anything a person needed to get done at the governmental level included at least six hoops to jump through!

I am in the process of getting my landline placed in my name. Tomorrow I will make my third trip to Loja to get it done. I'm hoping that this third time might actually be the charm here, too!

Susan F. wrote:

Yes, the paperwork here defies logic. Strangely enough, it was the same way in Kuwait when I lived there. However, they said they had a reason for it. Their reasoning was that they had to keep their citizens employed, so they made sure that anything a person needed to get done at the governmental level included at least six hoops to jump through!

And what North American doesn't love the idea of more government employees as a jobs program?

I have found that Ecuadorians like to exchange cordial hellos, but they expect you to say it first, even the proprietors of shops and restaurants. If you do not, they are offended but still will not initiate a hello. A few days ago two teen girls coming up a dirt road and talking, passed on the far side of the road where I was studying the scenery, and I did not say hi or look at them. As they passed by one grumbled to the other about not being noticed and given the obligatory greeting.  They wanted attention but the potential flirt (I'm decades older) didn't play their game. On the other hand, teen boys don't care about such stuff and would as soon ignore you. I usually do go out of my way to greet pedestrians on country roads, who respond, but I have to speak first.

bob zimway wrote:

I have found that Ecuadorians like to exchange cordial hellos, but they expect you to say it first, even the proprietors of shops and restaurants. If you do not, they are offended but still will not initiate a hello. A few days ago two teen girls coming up a dirt road and talking, passed on the far side of the road where I was studying the scenery, and I did not say hi or look at them. As they passed by one grumbled to the other about not being noticed and given the obligatory greeting.  They wanted attention but the potential flirt (I'm decades older) didn't play their game. On the other hand, teen boys don't care about such stuff and would as soon ignore you.

From Zim's other posts, I suppose these experiences were in Cuenca.

It's totally different here in Quito.  Shopkeepers, security guards, anfitriones constantly initiating verbal contact .. "Buenos días"  "¿Cómo está usted?"  "¿En qué le ayude?" -- How can I help you?

That's in the city.  On country roads with teenage girls of unclear intentions and teen boys whose attention is in their own worlds:  YMMV.

cccmedia in Quito

I see both in Cuenca: Locals that initiate and others that do not. It just depends on the people. The young girls were acting just as I would expect kids to act (i.e., with little respect). You can't expect much from kids.

I have always had the habit of saying, "Hello", so perhaps I am not a good person to remark on this reply, but here goes anyway.

I do know that my Ecuadorian friends in Southern Ecuador have told me that they are rather afraid of extranjeros. While many people in town have been around the foreign new guys in town, the people in the campos have not. They are only recently discovering that getting jobs in the gated communities pays better than other jobs...

Being friendly anywhere in the world is something foreigners can always do to show they have respect for the locals and gratitude for being able to live in countries other than their own

Susan F. wrote:

I have always had the habit of saying, "Hello", so perhaps I am not a good person to remark on this reply, but here goes anyway.

I do know that my Ecuadorian friends in Southern Ecuador have told me that they are rather afraid of extranjeros. While many people in town have been around the foreign new guys in town, the people in the campos have not. They are only recently discovering that getting jobs in the gated communities pays better than other jobs...

Being friendly anywhere in the world is something foreigners can always do to show they have respect for the locals and gratitude for being able to live in countries other than their own

Being friendly and saying hello works all over the world for me, no matter what response I get.

To use an old quote, If someone doesn't have a smile, give him one of yours.

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I am the same way Susan as far as the smile and hello.  A face that shows respect and care by a simple smile opens a lot of doors any ware in the world.  Being of Hispanic culture it is usually the person that enters a shop or a bus or the likes that is supposed/expected to greet the people that were all ready there.  This is taught as just manners at a very early age.  I think  It is not so much being offended as it is thinking that we are rude for not addressing the group with a hello.  It really is a cultural thing in Spain as well as all over Latin America.  But I find that it works every ware.  Thanks for the topic