Your experience of culture shock in Colombia

People here seem to have a very odd idea of standing in a queue or waiting their turn for anything. Nothing makes my blood boil more than waiting in a queue (for a bus, in a bank, to buy food, etc etc) and someone will just casually step in in front of me, they usually become outraged when you dare to point out there's line of people waiting.

My first words in Spanish were: "Um...la fila..."

Do - queue.
Don't - push in.

Also, don't expect anyone to care when you tell them there's a long queue and they should respect you and the people who have been waiting. That won't happen. They just look at you like YOU'RE the rudest person alive.

A woman, who actually did not look even an inch pregnant, stood in front of me and around 30 other people in a bank queue once. No one said anything, they looked at each other but still, nothing, I asked what she was doing, I had been waiting for 30 minutes. She told me she was pregnant so she gets to go first. Of course I've let pregnant ladies go first, of course, but many tend to ask if it's fine first. She literally pushed me back to get in. (A woman holding a baby once did the same, as soon as someone let her go in front of the hugggggge line, her husband appeared and took her place - she went to go and sit in the car with the baby). Is jumping in a sport here?

You may be able to tell that I'm not enamoured with Bogota or the lacking manners of a huge % of people here. Not everyone, some actually agree with me and join in asking others to respect the fact people were waiting... but a sizable amount just have no clue, or simply don't care.

Bad manners are not the kind of culture shock I expected when I moved here 3 1/2 years ago, but they're what I've seen most of. Others:

- Don't even get me started on how people try to get on the Transmilenio before people have been able to get off it.
- Personal questions, with seemingly no limit. Someone meets you for the first time: "Why is your hair like that, was it a mistake? It doesn't suit you." "How old? Why don't you have children soon? You should...are you medically able? Is that why you're 31 and have not had any yet? You know you can get treatment!" < actually a quote.
- Being told you're pale 'like the moon' and 'what a shame' about it. I've been told I look "sick" by people in the street because I have pale skin.

Amazing.

If you want an easy life, try to put up with the lack of lining up and waiting, don't worry if you get pushed around trying to get off at your Transmilenio stop, ignore the 'Gringa' related slurs in the street, don't listen to overly personal questions, if you don't want or have kids yet - that's cool, just don't go into detail or people will question you further - trust me on this.

Also, if you're a vegan (more popular here now I believe, but 3 years ago it was so difficult) be prepared for people to ask you "what's wrong with you" and try to "feed you up" on cheese. Also, shopkeepers rarely know what's in their food - if you ask if something has milk, egg, nuts etc in, they WILL say "I don't know."

After having lived in Paraguay and Ecuador I liked the Colombians but I thought they were a bit cold. I figured two things contributed to that; 1) only 10 years ago there were bombs in the streets with their war against the FARC, 2) I was in Cali which is a big city of a million people. The other places I had lived were about half that and it's been my experience that the larger the city, the more guarded people are.

ps- most people in Ecuador don't even understand the concept of a line so if most of the Colombians were lining up then they are ahead of what is average for South America. Paraguay is the friendliest place so far but man oh man is the summer long and hot!

Actually Cali is now about 2.3 million people.  Yes, often people there are guarded, just because of crimes of opportunity which can occur anywhere, anytime.  My Colombian wife's family is forever chiding and chastising me, for talking to too many people on the streets there.

Having family there, I get to see how warm and open at least some of them are in family settings.  I also see that in many celebrations, they do have a strong sense of community which includes a sense of fair play and courtesy - but it's normally or not always as strong as what I was used to, growing up as a kid in the US.  I think you are right, also, that in smaller cities and communities people who know one another are often more open.