Marrying a Pakistani

personal experience or personal views?

I wouldn't say that i agree or disagree with you on your views but i would say a nationality, not always, determines what life does a person live or how open/narrow minded he/she is. The points that you have noted, with regards to marrying a Pakistani, are prevailing all around the world. Mother-in-laws, compromise, extra-marital affairs etc. are not just restricted to Pakistani. I have worked and know even American who have this same issues. Everything depends on how forward thinking, liberal, broad minded, educated the person is. And of course, this should me discussed thoroughly before even you entertain the thought of marriage.
And if all that you noted in true, i hope not, then its not just restricted to "white" women.

'Twas based from personal experiences. Im not even married but my boyfriend is Pakistani. One of my friend from L.A. was married to a Paki guy and she started to live in hell. She was mentally drained as the spouse married his first cousin and the cowife together with the sister-i-law tried to poison her. It was enslaving she said. Makes me feel like I want to run away upon knowing these things.

@disderio

Hello there, lately these blogs about marrying a pakistani guy thing is haunting me. I am bound to be married later this year but when I came across blogs and blogs denoting PRECAUTIONS and WHY NOT TO MARRY these guys hit me like a boomerang. I thought it was humorous at first but the later topics got more and more serious. From marrying first cousins to enslaving by ammi jaan, and it could be worst amiright? I am not that culturally familiar with Pakistan and I was in shock knowing this gonna happen to me when I get married??!

Hi, I can understand your fears and you may be right about them. What i want to suggest you is that before jumping on to marriage, i would say that you must make absolutely sure about his background and his family, What he wants and expects from you after marriage, will you be allowed to live your life with freedom and make your own decision..so on and so forth. Unless the guy commits to your rights and give you equal respect and status, i would say its not good idea to get married, forget about Pakistani, just to anyone.

Disderio wrote:

Hi, I can understand your fears and you may be right about them. What i want to suggest you is that before jumping on to marriage, i would say that you must make absolutely sure about his background and his family, What he wants and expects from you after marriage, will you be allowed to live your life with freedom and make your own decision..so on and so forth. Unless the guy commits to your rights and give you equal respect and status, i would say its not good idea to get married, forget about Pakistani, just to anyone.

You are absolutely right. I am afraid he is dominant over me and I am becoming less of myself.  I am the outgoing type and i believe it'll be a big problem for us, he said wife should be at home with her mom. It would be like giving him a gun, pointing at me and hoping he doesnt pull the trigger.

francheska29 wrote:

You are absolutely right. I am afraid he is dominant over me and I am becoming less of myself.  I am the outgoing type and i believe it'll be a big problem for us, he said wife should be at home with her mom. It would be like giving him a gun, pointing at me and hoping he doesnt pull the trigger.

Cultures vary, as do opinions regarding those cultures.
If you're so concerned, it isn't the time to marry.

Maybe I do needed more time to think it ova. Anyway, thanks fred.