Checking your spouse's phone!

To my way of thinking there's a great difference between accidentally reading a message when the phone has been given to you, than deliberately snooping through messages without your spouse's knowledge or consent.

The first is accidental and forgiveable, the second is an outright invasion of privacy and shows a total lack of respect and trust for one's partner

Just think about this for a moment...

You may have access to your wife's purse, but does that give you the right to go snooping around in it??? Absolutely not, unless of course you have been given express permission to get something out of the purse for her. If your husband went rummaging around through your purse without your consent or even your knowledge you would feel that it was a complete invasion.

Same if your wife went snooping around through your wallet without your knowledge. It is not about not having anything to hide, it's about RESPECT for the other person's privacy.

I've never seen inside a woman's purse in my lifetime, not my mother's purse and not my wife's... the contents are NONE OF MY BUSINESS. I have often been asked to get something out of a purse. I flatly refuse to do so, because it's not my place to be rooting around in there. In exactly the same way I would never go sneaking around reading messages or checking to see who's telephone numbers are on the speed dial of my wife's phone. NONE OF MY BUSINESS, GROSS INVASION OF PRIVACY and COMPLETE LACK OF RESPECT AND TRUST.

Cheers,
James      Expat-blog Experts Team

If there is nothing to hide and nothing to be suspicious. ..why want to check 😉
I guess even if we are married..I do still want my little privacy. Like the gals little jokes and gossip. .or the men's talk between the guys.
TRUST..if u trust,don't doubt and respect one another.  😊

i do not think  it is a good idea , if one of my male  male   male  friends  told me an adult joke  i wanna  keep it for myself lol

Spouse or anyone else...without permission, it's a perpetration.

It's that simple.

Its just a reflex action where Neural forces push your hand to that phone.

Come on peeps, let's be honest everybody wanna know if their partner is getting jiggy with it somewhere. But you might land on a serious bomb. Beware of falling debris

Mariamns wrote:

Its just a reflex action where Neural forces push your hand to that phone.

Come on peeps, let's be honest everybody wanna know if their partner is getting jiggy with it somewhere.

I haven't met Neural, but I know a rationalization when I hear or read it.

Keep It Simple ... no phone snooping without explicit permission.

cccmedia

I get messages from women, and I talk to women, but not in a naughty way.
My phone is always on the same shelf when I'm in the house, and there is no access code.
My wife never touches it.

Equally, I leave her phone alone unless it's to put a cartoon on for baby Fred.

I have same thingking like you before, but my husband doesnt allow me to check him hp . According to him, thats is privacy between couple . Most of my friend totally disagree with his statement , for a girl that is a must to check spouse' hp .

But i hve to respect my husband &  i get used to it now

My mother (or was it my grandmother?) used to tell us kids, "What you don't know, won't hurt you."

Gordon Barlow wrote:

My mother (or was it my grandmother?) used to tell us kids, "What you don't know, won't hurt you."

Yes, thats why i dont want to check his hp. If i eventually discover he cheated on me , he know what is the circumstances . I've remind my spouse many times never ever do something bad behind me . Life is like karma , if someone did something bad to u , he/she will get back . Just let it be .

In my opinion...I won't check it.....coz its his privacy and I trust him....so if ever he is playing around.... You will know it in time.....you can't hide anything in this world!!!   

chikky3 wrote:

hi pepole,
in your opinion, is it right to go through your spouse's phone, weather with pemission or not.

in my opinion i think its ok if there is nothing to hide.

share your opinion?

I thought most people had a password in order to unlock the phone and access? I think if they don't, then they probably don't have something to hide or haven't yet figured out how to prevent access. I agree with you - I also think it's okay to check it. But do it in front of them - then judging from their reaction, if they try to grab it from you  - that should be quite telling.

malou.corpuz wrote:

In my opinion...I won't check it.....coz its his privacy and I trust him....so if ever he is playing around.... You will know it in time.....you can't hide anything in this world!!!   

Yes exactly ! Each people deserve to has their own privacy . It is not all about we allow them to do something bad . Let say he also has his own privacy to talk something with his friend & family whereby we are not suppose to know . Sometimes me either feels uncomfortable if my husband read my conversation with my mum n my friend . My friend always texted me when she has a problem with her bf & not good for my husband to read it .

XB23 wrote:

if they try to grab it from you  - that should be quite telling.

Yes, I will grab it as it's my phone and to protect my privacy! !!

I have no password because I'm a very good boy.

No way is it ok it shows a lack of trust and i certainly wouldn't do it.

Oh this is an interesting point to ponder. I had this bf before & we were not regularly meeting. So Once, we met & without saying a word, he just took my phone & looked at stuff from pictures to messages in my inbox and even skype and viber. I just left him to do it because I really had nothing to hide. But to be honest? I wasn't quite happy at what he did; I almost felt he was checking on me & didn't trust me enough. Here's the punchline...I never really ever check or look on anybody else's phone for the sake of being nosey or spying. I think to say that an individual's phone is private stuff, is just like saying you respect each other's privacy; whether you are hubby/wifey, bf/gf, mom/daughter, dad/son etc! My loved ones can sleep knowing i will never invade their phones...cheers!!!!!!

Everyone habe his/her own privacy, there is no reason to check others mobile, you have ur own, it's all base on doubt and third person who push ur mind against ur life partner,  so do trust blindly on ur partner otherwise you trusting stupid people around us...and doubting ur life partner its ashamed. ..

There is miner things which broke a good relationship. ..

Why not? But consider that if you feel suspicious trust your instincts. A feeling of distrust is a warning sign that you shouldn't ignore!

"Trust but verify!"

faithandHope wrote:

Why not? But consider that if you feel suspicious trust your instincts. A feeling of distrust is a warning sign that you shouldn't ignore!

Except one could just be paranoid and insecure, and displaying this would often be a big turn off or relationship killer.  Sometimes it is better to ignore those feelings, or if the suspicion is that strong, to address it directly and openly.