Deciphering the relationship mentality of a swiss guy....HELP!

Just be natural and sincere, you both need time to adjust, different personalities and likes.Be happy for yourself don't let the judgements of others affect your happiness, good luck.

Depends on what part of Switzerland he is from. If more from the German side and he is older, say 50+, then will be more like a traditional German. Direct talking and traditional minded.  But also realize that many believe the same things about filipinas. And will also have more than one girl they will be meeting once they are here.

Thank you for the response but would you mind enlightening me with what you meant by "Same things about filipinas?" For i am abit confused.

Thank you for the advice and it is being duly noted   I am and have always been frank with him. And thats what he liked about me because he said so on his recent letter. He is in his early 30s while im in my late 30s hahaha. I am busy building a career and is (or is it now "was", still too early to tell) getting ready for spinster "ship" . Im taking it one day at a time and plan to have fun while getting to know him but this doesnt mean i wont be heeding more advice from anyone.  I have little experience when it comes to western men and more advice would be very much welcomed.

Take care and God bless!

He will probably arise early, want a late breakfast about a hour to 2 hours after he is up. They tend to like a neat house, And consider it more the wives job to see to there. They usually like a beer or 2 of a afternoon. They are usually good for the outside the home jobs like lawn care.  They do like  not to many surprises. Not great romantics. And are prone to enjoy acordian music And classical.

dhnindc wrote:

Depends on what part of Switzerland he is from. If more from the German side and he is older, say 50+, then will be more like a traditional German. Direct talking and traditional minded.  But also realize that many believe the same things about filipinas. And will also have more than one girl they will be meeting once they are here.

Quite nonsense what you saying here don't you think so ?

"He will probably arise early, want a late breakfast about a hour to 2 hours after he is up. They tend to like a neat house, And consider it more the wives job to see to there. They usually like a beer or 2 of a afternoon. They are usually good for the outside the home jobs like lawn care.  They do like  not to many surprises. Not great romantics. And are prone to enjoy acordian music And classical." James Mitchel

He is usually awake very early around 5am, he says and needs to start work before 8am.

I have no problems doing household chores, I've been trained to do them since i was a kid. I guess my parents are abit conservative in their views of who should do what around the house though they also instill in us, their children, the idea that everybody helps around the house regardless of age and gender. lol. I enjoy doing chores inside the house (i am OC too so we have different slippers in and outside the house) but yard work? argh! quite a different story. I don't like bugs but i really DON'T like spiders.

Cross checking here hahaha.
Duly noted!

Thanks a bunch for the advice

He probably likes chocolate and mountain climbing, is used to hearing many different languages, so perhaps he will take an interest in Tagalog, Ilocano or whatever language you speak besides English.  It is best when speaking to him or to others in his presence to speak a language he understands or he may wonder what is REALLY being said.  Good Luck!!

Nordic- German-Swiss, Women consider the inside of the house there's. They arrange the furniture and tidy the inside of the home.  He was probably raised that way by a good Swiss mother. So he will not say much as to the way you arrange the furniture as long as the house is tidy.

James Mitchel wrote:

Nordic- German-Swiss, Women consider the inside of the house there's. They arrange the furniture and tidy the inside of the home.  He was probably raised that way by a good Swiss mother. So he will not say much as to the way you arrange the furniture as long as the house is tidy.

Thank you again all the advice, I've received were great. I have no complains cause i like doing those but I need input. lol. I think i am color blind.

But I don't think we, the swiss guy and I, are going to work. To many mysteries to solve and I don't like to be kept in the dark when its my life that's involve

I wish it would have ended better but life must go on.

Thank you all and God bless!

The beauty of the internet is that there are no mysteries to hide provided we ask all the questions from curiosity  and we can even see each other !!

The airfare is naturally quite high from Europe and I wouldn't blame him to set up some meetings with other contacts whilst he is here.

Switzerland is a beautiful country I've hiked around the YMCAs and driven through the country a couple of times, very clean and ...spic and span..haha

If he comes over why not meet for a coffee somewhere among  other people ....u never know u might just "clic"

I am not Swiss. I am American. I know. I know. Don't judge me please. I admit I cannot speak of Swiss culture directly, but I do know a few things about cross cultural communication. My wife is from the Philippines and I'm in the import trade throughout Asia. Language is never an issue. In fact, she corrects my English all the time. But the basis for our decisions and our way of thinking about subjects is very much different from one another. You both need to be aware of that. I would strongly suggest that the both of you read up on Hofstede's cultural dimensions at geert-hofstede.com/dimensions.html. Go further into the Cultural Tools and run a side by side comparison of the Philippines and Switzerland. That will give you a general sense of not so much what, but why each of you think the way you do. As for personality and character of the individual, your instincts as a woman will be correct. If you're not 100% comfortable with him - run! Odds are he though he's a good and decent man. Just be careful. By nature of the way you met, he's likely a polite, quiet and isolated type of personality. Filipinas on the other hand tend to be highly social. Balancing his need to be alone from people with your need to be with people can be a challenge. Never let him separate you from your support group and you'll be just fine. Should he pass the first interview, be sure he understands and accepts basic cultural tenets of Filipino life - remittance, balikbayan boxes & pasalubong. I was once told 'you don't marry a Filipina, you marry her entire family'. Truer words have never been spoken. But I'm all the richer for it. Good luck!

mztque wrote:

But I don't think we, the swiss guy and I, are going to work. To many mysteries to solve and I don't like to be kept in the dark when its my life that's involve

I wish it would have ended better but life must go on.

Thank you all and God bless!

Well, if you say it is over, then it is over,
Further advice is fruitless.

Hard to generalise about guys from different countries.
I am married to a Pinay and go there every year. On my travels I meet quite a few guys who are married and just looking for some fun. If you are feeling suspicious just be carefull.
If you are sure he is not married, go for it, who knows. You might even fall in love.

Niles Newton wrote:

I am not Swiss. I am American. I know. I know. Don't judge me please. I admit I cannot speak of Swiss culture directly, but I do know a few things about cross cultural communication. My wife is from the Philippines and I'm in the import trade throughout Asia. Language is never an issue. In fact, she corrects my English all the time. But the basis for our decisions and our way of thinking about subjects is very much different from one another. You both need to be aware of that.

I would strongly suggest  that the both of you read up on Hofstede's cultural dimensions at geert-hofstede.com/dimensions.html.  Go further into the Cultural Tools and run a side by side comparison of the Philippines and Switzerland. That will give you a general sense of not so much what, but why each of you think the way you do.

As for personality and character of the individual, your instincts as a woman will be correct. If you're not 100% comfortable with him - run! Odds are he though he's a good and decent man. Just be careful.

By nature of the way you met, he's likely a polite, quiet and isolated type of personality. Filipinas on the other hand tend to be highly social. Balancing his need to be alone from people with your need to be with people can be a challenge. Never let him separate you from your support group and you'll be just fine.

Should he pass the first interview, be sure he understands and accepts basic cultural tenets of Filipino life - remittance, balikbayan boxes & pasalubong.  I was once told 'you don't marry a Filipina, you marry her entire family'. Truer words have never been spoken. But I'm all the richer for it.

Good luck!

oh i would have loved reading this advice when i was still undecided. He is often busy and could only speak with me thru emails when he has time being a doctor and all while i wanted to be in touch with him often, i guess compromise is not in his vocabulary. He told me i needed to understand him or we should not continue and so I told him good luck! We both haven't heard from each other since

I do understand him being in the healthcare field too but i didn't like that he doesn't want to meet half way and the way he leaves me abruptly without any word.

Thank you!

Peter Clark wrote:

The beauty of the internet is that there are no mysteries to hide provided we ask all the questions from curiosity  and we can even see each other !!

The airfare is naturally quite high from Europe and I wouldn't blame him to set up some meetings with other contacts whilst he is here.

Switzerland is a beautiful country I've hiked around the YMCAs and driven through the country a couple of times, very clean and ...spic and span..haha

If he comes over why not meet for a coffee somewhere among  other people ....u never know u might just "clic"

we would have loved that but we don't see eye to eye with regards to both our schedules and his inability to compromise to find time for us.

We both love coffee and conversing, we would have tons to talk about.

kickintheass wrote:

Hard to generalise about guys from different countries.
I am married to a Pinay and go there every year. On my travels I meet quite a few guys who are married and just looking for some fun. If you are feeling suspicious just be carefull.
If you are sure he is not married, go for it, who knows. You might even fall in love.

I trust him when he said he is single. We decided to not prolong the inevitable and amicably stopped our correspondence since we don't see eye to eye about our schedule.

Thank you for your advice! Maybe next time when i meet another non filipino guy and have a long distance relationship, i would go over all your advices! God bless!

mugtech wrote:

He probably likes chocolate and mountain climbing, is used to hearing many different languages, so perhaps he will take an interest in Tagalog, Ilocano or whatever language you speak besides English.  It is best when speaking to him or to others in his presence to speak a language he understands or he may wonder what is REALLY being said.  Good Luck!!

I was teaching him some filipino words and he is starting to teach me german swiss but i told him (since he is often busy with work) i wont learn all those words unless i hear it first hand.

I am not Swiss but I am a man. Former pastor and married 25 years. Do your due diligence to find out as much information about this guy as you can. His history, financial status etc..,Take your time in getting to know him.

When he visit check out how he acts when he gets mad, upset etc.., remember what you see is what you get. Don't think you can change whatever you don't like about him. One key thing is talk about everything in regard to a relationship and family. I am an American. Most guys have problem not knowing the culture of a filipina. It would help him if he understood and could embrace your culture.

Communication is key. Follow your heart and inward prompting  not just your mind along. I hope this helps in some way.

Wayne 07 wrote:

I am not Swiss but I am a man. Former pastor and married 25 years. Do your due diligence to find out as much information about this guy as you can. His history, financial status etc..,Take your time in getting to know him.

When he visit check out how he acts when he gets mad, upset etc.., remember what you see is what you get. Don't think you can change whatever you don't like about him. One key thing is talk about everything in regard to a relationship and family. I am an American. Most guys have problem not knowing the culture of a filipina. It would help him if he understood and could embrace your culture.

Communication is key. Follow your heart and inward prompting  not just your mind along. I hope this helps in some way.

Thank you! I would keep this in mind for always. Sepp, the swiss guy, is a very nice guy maybe i just am not used to his schedule. He and I are very far from each other and as s filipina who is very affectionate doesnt know how to show my affection online.....the distance and he told me that he just wanted to tell me thats how he is and that he didnt want to hurt me. I have to understand him like how he wants since he does really seem to care about me.

This is a work in progress. We are again talking whenever he has time. He is someone dependable and is very strict in sticking with his schedule. He is a survivor and independent doesnt want to depend on anybody for he is an orphan.