FOR GİRLS: Creepy guys in Turkey

Is anyone else having a problem with mainly Turkish guys messaging you?

Im getting "hello" messages everyday on here and facebook! follwed by a friend request.
Thats all the message says: hello
Just like if a complete stranger were to say hello to me on the street I would not reply.
Is there any type of spam filter on Expat.com?

Ive changed my profile picture on Expat.com and even updated my bio adding a defnition because obviously none of them understand what a fiance is, or they just dont even take the time to read about the person they are creepin on.

any thoughts?

How does a girl use a social network without getting bombarded with this?

Hi ladies, its a general turkish man behaviour. Just ignore them:) have a nice living in Turkey:)

This is just a snob topic.

I guess your one of them then. This post is not meant to be snobby. I am not afraid to share this and let guys see it, but i guess its making you feel threatened.

My next post should be about foreign women getting raped abroad. Im sure I will get some commetns on there saying I am snobby too.

Many of our female members have this problem on several different forums, not just here. The only way to combat this problem, unfortunately depends on YOU.

When you read a topic posting that is objectionable, abusive or offensive in any way please do not hesitate to click the REPORT triangle that you'll find in the upper right-hand corner above the particular posting.

If your receive any annoying or offensive private messages then just click on the ACTION button to report it. (Note - in order to report a private message you must first click on VIEW)

Also in the private messages main page you will find just above the first message string in the list a button that shows 3 gears, this is the MANAGE CONVERSATIONS button and you can use that to delete messages.

All reported topic postings and private messages will be dealt with very quickly by TEAM, in most cases the offenders are banned from Expat-blog.

So to all you would-be Romeos out there! Get the hint.... if you wish to continue being a member of Expat-blog then...

http://i1320.photobucket.com/albums/u531/wjwoodward/DATESITE_zps40374a09.jpg

Cheers,
William James Woodward, EB Experts Team

U r wrong Mrs.Snob.
U dont know even i am a girl or boy. U r one of them who talk like u know everything and everyone in the world. U know nothing about world. İm a greek. And if u dont like turkey or another foreign country u can back to ur own country. Where is ur original country? Because usa and europa is trying to.be first country on having raped women.

Beatricekarova wrote:

Hi ladies, its a general turkish man behaviour. Just ignore them:) have a nice living in Turkey:)


Hello Beatrice,

While you may think this is just the normal behaviour of Turkish men, it IS NOT ACCEPTABLE here on Expat-blog. It should not just be ignored either... it should always be reported.

Cheers,
William James Woodward, EB Experts Team

Hello William,

so nice to hear that is not acceptable around here. Thank you for your kind reply. 

Cheers

silent.life wrote:

İf i am a woman and i dont want to get bothered by men's messages then i can fix my profile to accept message from only my friends. Thats too easy. and secondly remove ur picture from ur avatar. Thats too easy too. So no need to cry around. Just try to be smart some.


I'm sorry, but you are absolutely wrong silent life... It is up to all of our members to conform to Expat-blog's Terms & Conditions of Use and to the CODE OF CONDUCT for every one of our national forums. Female members don't need to do anything since THEY are not the ones violating any rules here. I realize that some men think that they have a God-given right to hit on anything wearing a skirt, however it is not acceptable here and never will be. You can continue to blame the women all you wish to, but the fact remains that it's the men who are breaking the rules. Just think about your statement for one minute... If you were the one being constantly harassed by female members, should YOU be forced to use a generic avatar or username that wouldn't identify one's gender? Completely ridiculous!

Cheers,
William James Woodward, EB Experts Team

Silent.life,

The problem is not sending private messages to anyone, but the KIND of messages that get sent. No member has to put up with unsolicited messages that are annoying, abusive, obscene or harassing.

I guess you haven't looked at the Turkey Forum Code of Conduct or the Expat-blog Terms & Conditions of Use then, because the rules are all there and clearly spelled out. Furthermore all members have to indicate that they have READ and will ABIDE BY these rules as a part of their registration. Those who don't are simply banned if they violate them..... END OF STORY.

If you do not like the rules at Expat-blog you're quite free to go elsewhere!

silent.life,

Sorry, but it sounds more like you're trying to justify people sending those messages by simply saying the recipient doesn't have to accept them. This is beside the point and is completely wrong, sending these messages violates Expat-blog rules, whether the recipient accepts them or not.

I suggest that you take the time to read Expat-blog's Terms & Conditions of Use and the Turkey Forum Code of Conduct, both clearly set out the rules that members are expected to conform to. These rules apply to everyone and they are not up for negotiation, period.

Ladies, do not hesitate to report ALL topic postings and/or private messages that you find annoying, abusive, offensive or obscene.

@silent.life: Then don't be surprised if you are banned for violating our conditions. We won't waste any time either.

Thanks
Armand
Expat.com Team

Ebk I was born in Croatia near the Bosnian border; I left my country as a child because of a brutal war that used rape as one of its main tactics to terrorize and kill my people. I was lucky to grow up in the U.S.A. as a refugee.

Silent.life Where are you getting your statistics about rape?
The US army is NOT my army; I have no control of any military force.  And the American army also has women soldiers.  The Iraq war wasnt about killing men.  I dont understand your argument here or the type of comparisons you are trying to make between all of these unrelated topics.

Wjwoodward completely understands my intention of this post and has really given a deeper insight to this topic. Thank you.

I dont have any problem with Turkish men, I am engaged to one! I have a problem with unwanted attention on women by men. I have been living in Turkey by choice for two years. I was raised as a Muslim and this is why I have chosen to live here to be closer to the Ummah and my faith.

I have had similar posting replies from Nigerians, asking me to help them find a place to live and jobs at of no where. Just delete and do not reply.  Not sure of any other option.

Good luck
Bye
Gail

It is just funny topic. You can not divide the peoples into group as you deserve. When you start use The Turks where goings to general argument. Does not matter how you describe or define. I am expecting that People should shows more respect while doing nationalities definitions.

Hi all,

@Gail: Please report first to us and we shall deal with it.

@pure_water: There is nothing funny here. Though we might agree on avoiding generalisation, we, at Expat.com take unsollicited messaging very seriously.

Regards
Armand
Expat.com Team

You are not the only one. And the sad thing is that this is an expat forum, why should someone from Turkey, who is living here, and has no intention of being an expat anywhere else, even join the forum? The mind boggles. I have already reported someone who sent me a harassing message. And I think silent life is one of the offenders, which is why he is getting so upset.

I understand what you mean, its common to see turkish guys behave in this manner. Simply ignore them and be in the company of people you are familiar with incase of a physical confrontation. Also, learning Turkish and understanding turkish culture is key to been safe.

I think we need a part 2 or a sticky for this post.  :o

I posted on Craigslist a message for expats not Turks.  The message if you are Turkish do not reply but they are unable to read!  They never think!

Well the world is big not just turkish men can bother people i just guess you have to care more about real life than over the internet i have had my issues with spam and messages and its worldwide eiether try to copy you spam you or make a fake account with your name and photos thats over the web in real life also i face trouble but best style is to show no emotion and walk the hell away from any situations not good then your fine :)

si

Hi,

I am sorry to hear about your experience, unfortunately we do have some weird guys lurking around profiles and guys  bombarding people with '' Hello'' s here or on Facebook . You are not the only one. This doesn't mean it is acceptable
or I don't mean you should just have a cuppa and ignore it.
Report them each time, block them where possible . If needed name &shame them. There are good people out there as well as bad ones.
What I do not like is the term 'Turkish Guys' . I do believe it is not  fair to generalize whether it's the Turks, Germans or Afghanis.

imisaba bibi wrote:

There are good people out there as well as bad ones.
What I do not like is the term 'Turkish Guys' . I do believe it is not  fair to generalize whether it's the Turks, Germans or Afghanis.


That's exactly right, this is not a problem that is confined to just one group of "creepy _____ guys" you can fill in the blank with almost any nationality you choose to. It still isn't all of them either. I'm sure that there are some "creepy Canadian guys" out there too, but we're not all that way. Generalizing just creates another problem.

The problem is not confined to just one forum either, sad to say. We are always trying our best to eliminate this kind of harassment every step of the way, but it is not easy and it requires YOUR assistance. Members MUST report every unsolicited private message of this kind. It will be handled quickly, dealt with seriously and the offenders will never know who the report came from. That's for a couple of reasons, first they're probably doing this with so many women that it could be any number of them; second they'll be long gone from here anyway!!!

Cheers,
James     
Expat-blog Experts Team

Don't pay them any attention. I'm an American-born Indian woman and I get tons of messages from losers in India. Their mindsets are similar to that of men in Turkey.

Here are a couple of reasons why they would message you:
- they want develop some kind of friendship/relationship with you in order to get immigration. Never fall into this trap; it can be very dangerous. There was an Indian guy who met an American lady online and used her. This guy married her and afterwards forced her to get life insurance. You know what happened next? She mysteriously died. He got status, her property, her money, and used that to marry a woman from India and bring her here. He was caught 20 years later. Be very careful.
- they want to show you off as a "trophy piece" to their relations. This can also be very bad. They would gossip about you and demote your reputation. They would basically make you look like a "whore" when you were just trying to make a friend.
- they are brainwashed to think that White/American women are sluts so they want to use them for sex and that's it.
- (in rare cases) they may be a good and genuine person, and would like to get to know you more.

Men who write just "hello" are probably not writing it to only you. They are probably sending the same message to hundreds of women.

And this is just a general post, so if anyone wants to mingle with men from the East:

Red flags:
- If he gloats about his place and says it's absolutely perfect, no problems, etc. he's a total liar. For example, I'm a Keralite (means my origins are from Kerala). There is a place in Kerala with high tourist traffic called Alappuzha. A LOT of foreigners get mugged, raped, and even killed there. I set my nationality as "American" to test these people. One guy said to me "oh there are no problems there, come soon!" when in fact I know through my family members that there are problems... like that, if he doesn't care about your safety and just wants you to come there as soon as possible, big red flag.
- If he's a double-sided person. Means this guy completely bashes on Americans in forums and at the same time praises them in front of you LOL.
- If he praises you too much and treats you like some kind of goddess in the very beginning, there is definitely something up.
- If the guy talks about politics too much, especially regarding relations with the US and the Middle East. Ties in with the 2nd point.

Be free, but also be cautious. :)

Also, ignore the weirdos who reply with "this is just typical Turkish man behavior" lol... look, I am from the East, and people from good families don't behave like that. Only the losers do.