How to make friends in Santo Domingo

The best way to meet nice people and make friends is to find the nearest Jehovah's Witness Kingdom hall and visit.  Let them know a little bit about yourself and you will be amazed at how many friends you will find!

I have been here for about a year and I would question making friends with locals.  My experience has been that eventually a Dominican friend will ask you for money and I have never been paid back.  If somebody here offers to help you, they usually expect payment.

Sorry to be so negative, but I would also advise against making friends with tourists.  There are some good ones, but there are a lot of stupid ones who will eventually need help and along the way will probably accuse you of trying to rip them off.

I have to disagree with not making friends with Dominicans. Maybe you need to improve the quality of friends you are making. If you do not want Dominicna friends, or tourist friends, who are your friends?  Are you really happy here????

Bob K

Bob makes a good point. My advice is always to be really really careful.

Understand that culturally here you are JUDGED by  who you ASSOCIATE with. Make no mistake that everyone is watching! And even if they are not assume they are LOL  The Capital is different then other places, we can blend in a little bit better.  But we are still not and never will be locals.

Make friends here:
1.  Get to know your neighbors
2.  Get to know your coworkers
3.  Find a hobby,  learn to dance,  whatever and meet like minded people. 

Worst way -  at some club, pub or dance location!!!!

I cut my teeth in the barrios of Puerto Plata after my first touristy visit in 2005.I grew up in bad nieghborhoods in Miami,Chicago,and LA.I blend in a lil better than some and am pretty well known but not considered a local.
       Been all over Dr and found that you should get to know your nieghbors first. I choose older more established Dominicans that own their home or have a business.I get to know them by asking questions, in my strange spanish,about small cultural stuff and expressing how much i like DR.Dominicans are very proud. The older people kept me on the straight and narrow and signaled me about who tried to latch on to me.
   Americans and other expats tend to age slower than Domincans,so older Dominicans are pleasantly surprised to find that im the same age they are.
While i dont recommend the barrios for most,this is how i make friends anywhere in DR.


Jaxterstone

Jaxterstone wrote:

I cut my teeth in the barrios of Puerto Plata after my first touristy visit in 2005.I grew up in bad nieghborhoods in Miami,Chicago,and LA.I blend in a lil better than some and am pretty well known but not considered a local.
       Been all over Dr and found that you should get to know your nieghbors first. I choose older more established Dominicans that own their home or have a business.I get to know them by asking questions, in my strange spanish,about small cultural stuff and expressing how much i like DR.Dominicans are very proud. The older people kept me on the straight and narrow and signaled me about who tried to latch on to me.
   Americans and other expats tend to age slower than Domincans,so older Dominicans are pleasantly surprised to find that im the same age they are.
While i dont recommend the barrios for most,this is how i make friends anywhere in DR.


Jaxterstone

Great post!!!!  That is what I did recently.  We moved to a nice area inside a barrio in Santo Domingo.  By getting to know our neighbors we have been accepted quite readily. They already look out for us and give us helpful advice about who to buy from, who to look out for etc.  Stopping to shoot the breeze, talk about the lousy electricity,  admire the babies and small children is culturally expected and just plain fun!!!!  And of course having an occasional cold one at the local colmado is good for everything!!!!!

spacer wrote:

Sorry to be so negative, but I would also advise against making friends with tourists.  There are some good ones, but there are a lot of stupid ones who will eventually need help and along the way will probably accuse you of trying to rip them off.

wow! you really have had a bad experience!

From point of view it is not a matter of dominicans or expats, the Dominican republic is a Country that is adapting to its reality, a lot of money is coming from abroad to invest in the Contry and that brings all kind of people interested... specially the bad ones. But I have seen in my years here more expats fooling money to other expats.

About Dominicans asking for money, even that I agree with you, it doesn't happen to everibody, nobody in my 13 years living here has asked me for a loan, just because they if they get to know me, they know I am not that kind of person... what I mean is that if you have to play your roll in this.

regards!

ps

hello,

Could you please concentrate on the initial topic?

The title of this thread is "How to make friends in Santo Domingo"

Thank you,

A little story about making friends here in Santo Domingo:  Last evening we went to Las Ruinas in the Colonial Zone.  It is a beautiful old location where every Sunday night 100's of mostly Dominicans come together to enjoy life.

There is live music - Salsa, Son and Merengue  is the music of choice.  You will see the very old, the very young, affluent, the less affluent,  a few tourists and some expats like myself who call this home.

In one evening I met at least 15 people anxious to make me feel at home.  Behind us was a group celebrating a birthday!  By the end of the evening we were having our piece of cake.  There was a bride and groom in their finery,  young families enjoying the festive atmosphere and people dancing anywhere their feet found room on the floor.

My point,  go to where Dominicans go.  Enjoy the ambiance.  Don't be shy.  Speak to people around you.  They love to share their country with you, enjoy it!  I know for sure I will see several of those same people next Sunday in the same place,  I will get to know them better and over time, friendships will blossom.

It isn't all that difficult! And it sure is fun!  If you are in town just let me know......... we will see you at Las Ruinas.  BTW  it is free!

I've been visiting the DR for more than 10 years.  I have found that it is very easy to make friends. Dominican are some of the friendliest and giving people I have had the pleasure of encountering on the planet.  I wouldn't advise seeking friends in church unless you are also a religious person. And although they are friendly, there are needy people where every you go and religion will not stop them from asking for money.  I have had had my experience with this already. It is true, I have never found someone willing to do something for nothing there.  I always practice the same habit when people begin to come close to me, Dominicans or any other people. Before they have a chance to ask, I let it be known in casual conversation.  I say, "you know, I hate it when people ask me for money, I'm not a bank and I'm not here to lend money or help to support their family".  Now they already know what my answer will be if ever they ask me for money.  Those who choose to stay, will make a good friend. Those who slowly fade away, were never your friends to begin with.   If a persons intentions are to befriend me for the purpose of obtaining money, forget about it. I don't need that type of friendship and I will not grieve their absence.  As for being in a social atmosphere, I love it. It is true, Dominicans will make you feel as though you are part of the family. It is one of the reason I love the DR so much. So be wise and you choose your friends, don't let your friends choose you.

Hi, thank you @planner so much for this information.  My question is; is this still a good event to go to when you don't speak Spanish very well?  I have a dark skin tone so everyone thinks I'm Haitian when I try making friends in Spanish and some people have even been hostile.  Would this be a place English speakers would go? Or open minded people?

Its still an amazing venue full of all kinds of people.  There will be some English speakers but not sure how you would find them.  You are welcome to come with me one Sunday.

I believe tonight is cancelled due to rain.....yup lots if rain here this evening.

Las Ruinas sounds like an exciting place Planner - On vacations I always like to check out how the locals live, instead of all the touristy place.  Schedules permitting, maybe we could check it out.

Whats the deal with the English speakers though?  Elaborate if you can, forum or pm.

At any event mostly attended by locals, expect Spanish speaking!!! However you can almost always find someone who can speak English.  When you least expect it someone will overhere your English or your attempts at Spanish and they will jump in to chat or help. 

They love to help.  They love you try to speak their language.  If stuck look around for help.....and engage in conversation whenever the opportunity presents itself......Dominicans are ever so social!!!!!  Its a big part of the charm here.

Oh, Now I understand what you're speaking of.

When you said " There will be some English speakers there but sure how you would find them" I thought you were saying you don't know how one would find them in terms of their personality.  I misunderstood what you were saying but now I got it!!

Cool.  Yes here is the thing, you never know who speaks multiple languages......   So talk to everyone.....LOL