How to make friends in Hawaii

Making friends in Hawaii?  I can think of no place else where it is easier to make friends!  What it does take is that you are first and outgoing person, as opposed to an introvert.  You have to like people, and you have to like making friends! Second, it requires that you like being here. You have to have a genuine respect for your host culture.

In our 16 years here, we've encountered two kinds of people as regards the ability to make friends.  The first kind, and this is the category most folks fall into, make friends everywhere they go!  They're friend magnets.  We see people who have only lived here for months and they tell us they have more good friends here than they had accumulated their entire lives on the US Mainland.  The second type are the introverts.  These folks don't make eye contact and are very private.  They feel other people's interest in them is an invasion of their privacy.  These are usually the folks who move here for the perfect weather; the warm inviting ocean, maybe even the low cost of living compared to where they came from.  And they're the ones who after being here for a few months start to complain about this, then about that, and next thing you know they're packing their stuff and heading back to their old comfort zone on the Mainland.

Anyway, making friends in Hawaii is easy.  If you are any kind of a people person, it comes naturally. If you truly love people, and I mean people whose culture is different from yours, you're in.  We have never personally experienced any form of prejudice here.  In Hawaii, everybody is a minority, especially on the Big Island where we live.  We love it and when we go visit the Mainland and find ourselves in places that are like 95% Caucasian, it feels very weird.

Feel free to email with questions, or visit my blog at http://affordablehawaiiliving.blogspot.com/ and join in on some great conversation about moving to and living in Hawaii!

Hiloguy hopefully you can help put mu mind at ease. My wife is considering taking a job in Hawii on the big island, she is in health care and its a really good offer. We have three small children all under the age of 9. I have read horror stories about white children being victimized and called racial slurs. My children have never been exposed to any kind of racism and this would devistate them. It is really bad there or are these just isolated instances blown out of porportion.

Aloha, Florida Dad!

Congrats to your wife for having scored a job offer on The Big Island!   Regarding your concerns about the welfare of your kids, I don't know where you hear these "horror stories about racial incidents."  We have friends with young children, we around lots of kids from time to time, we have friends who are grade-school teachers, and it has been our experience that there are few places on this planet that are more culturally and racially diverse, yet each culture and race embraces the others and they all get along.

For the most part, kids here don't even notice what color or race their friends are.  What matters here is what is in the heart, not the color of the skin.

That being said, sure there are exceptions, and we read about them in the paper from time to time.  But these are not everyday occurrences, and until we know the facts about why the disturbance happened, we are in no position to judge “who started it.”

Here's a little story for you.  Last year we brought our 6 year old granddaughter over from the Mainland.  She was with us for two weeks and during that time had several encounters with lots of local kids.  One of those was at one of Hilo's beautiful beach parks, where she saw about six very brown kids all about her age gazing down into a tide pool looking at who-knows-what.  She was curious and just walked over to the group of local kids and they all started talking to her and showing her the treasures they were finding.  It was as if she was an old friend of theirs.  She is very white and fairly shy, but she felt the love and acceptance that we call “aloha” here.

In our humble opinions, you get back what you put forth, and that has never been more true than it is here.

I cover all of this in great detail in my book, “Affordable Paradise.”  At the risk of sounding like I'm trying to promote my book I really do think it would be a good read for you if you are planning a relocation to Hawaii, particularly The Big Island.  You can get a copy on Amazon, used, for very little, and I don't make anything from the sale of used books.  There is lots of info in that book that will assist you in many areas of your anticipated move.  Check out the reviews!

You can also visit my Blog http://affordablehawaiiliving.blogspot.com/ and eavesdrop on what others are asking about moving to and life in Hawaii.  Another good resource is punaweb.com.  Again, you can eavesdrop or sign up and ask anything you like of the many local folks who are also there.

Your kids will do fine here.  If they are even a little bit self-confident and outgoing, they will thrive!

I took the liberty of posting your question on my blog so others could benefit from the conversation.

Aloha Nui!

Hiloguy

Hi
My name is Tony
I am going to Hawaii for a holiday I would like to make friends with a lady, I like going dancing   
Especially salsa so if you like to know me please write to me at [email protected]

I will be staying in Hilo Hawaii for awhile. Whats the best way find a place and make friends??

Hello gillyv,

Welcome to Expat.com!

I would suggest you to introduce yourself in a new topic on the Hawaii forum for better visibility and also to help you to establish lots of new contacts.

Thank you,
All the best,
Christine

Hi hiloguy,

Thanks for your post and the link to your book which I'm off to go have a look at now! Our family is moving to Big Island at the end of august...

We'll be moving from Beijing, China. We have 3 kids under 8.

We're very very much looking forward to it!

Kona is beautiful and for me the best place to meet people is at the beaches. Be friendly, open and before you know it you are making friends.

Frenchgirl hi

Welcome to Beijing.

Please check out the Expat-Blog Beijing forum and look forward to meeting you when you arrive.

Hi Manlin,

I'm actually leaving china to move to hawaii. But thank you

Ooops note to self. Go to bed.

Really am a cool young exposed guy who has so much to share with awesome people in hawaii

Hi am william Michael living in hong kong I would to join you as friends in hawaii

That is great! Connect!!

Hawaii is dangerous.  Everyone's trying to get leid.




[Special note to whoever wants to delete this:  look up the word first.]

William micheal wrote:

Really am a cool young exposed guy who has so much to share with awesome people in hawaii

Being exposed could cause problems, there are laws

Hi    I am from Australia and considering moving to hawaii, would love some advice on who I would need to contact and very keen to hear and make friends with those who are currently living there.  I currently work as a relaxation/ healing massage therapist specialising for those with chronic illnesses, pain, disabilities, the aged.   Could anybody advise on how I could apply for a sponsership to work in Hawaii

Many thanks  Heather