Dating a Dominican Girl

I can't believe the sex is that good.  Do you need to be hit over the head repeatedly with a baseball bat?
The message is clear like it is in 99.99% of cases similar to yours.  She most likely has multiple other boyfriends gringo and Dominican.
My advice and last word on this us:

RUN AWAY AS FAST AS  YOUR FAT LITTLE LEGS WILL CARRY YOU and start thinking with the BIG head.

Bob K

Foolish. And you are headed for lots and lots of pain. Take Bobs advice, you're not cut out for this ex pat 'romance' life in the DR

No condom???  Do YOU use,  any birth control at all?   If she says that she takes the pill, do you personally put it in her mouth ^ watch her swallow it.   And stay watching her for several minutes to be sure it wasn't hidden under her tongue & then spit out.   There are some good, honest, attractive Dominican women, but she is NOT ONE OF THEM !!!!   Do not join the hundreds if not thousands of gringos that have been duped by beauty & great acting.   Get out before the exit door is closed & barred !!   You are traveling over quicksand & are sure to be mired in the sh-t.   You are prey & she is the predator.   Don't walk, don't run, but fly away immediately.   If you procrastinate,  hell fire & brimstone will bury forever.  You will end up saying, ,"woe  is me"  for the rest of your life & never will you get your own foot out of your ass. .  Nuff said.

LOL thanks for the reply Bob. And YES to answer your question the sex is that good and probably the tightest (you know what) that I have ever had as well that's why it was so confusing because usually when a woman is with a lot of men it's not tight. I am a good looking guy and was with a lot of women in college but I haven't been a player in the last seven years because I am looking for something serious. Thanks for your take, and it seemed pretty obvious to me too, I just wanted to get some different views. Thanks again.

Thanks for the Reply Gypsy. Yes of course she takes birth control and I watch her take the pill. It's been months since I left the DR and she is not pregnant so I'm glad that I did not get trapped in a bad situation.  I think you and Bob are correct in your assumptions as so was I, I just did not want to believe it. I speak Spanish so I'm sure when I cut my losses it won't be terribly difficult to find another one. 

Thanks for posting Cloop. I know I need more experience in regards to dating Dominican women because I have been hearing stories about the games some of these women have. But they have plenty of games here in the states too. I may not be quite ready for Dominican romance, but since I do work from home and can go there anytime I want -  I am happy to learn.

Yes, I understand. Get rid of that loser before she sets you up to be robbed or worse. It's already obvious she doesn't respect you, why are you wasting your time with that? There are plenty of decent women here... Don't be a chump! Gringos already have pre existing history of foolish behavior for the Dominicana - don't add your name to the list....

The difference between 'Game' in the US and here is - here it can be a matter of financial ruin, life or death and in some cases an introduction to the  Dominican justice system here- tread carefully my friend.

Classy gringo I have dating a Dominican woman for almost 4 years, notice I said woman and not girl, since there is a big difference! She exhibits none ot that behavior.  I have only one question for you. Do you really want to be with a girl who makes your mind wonder so much when she is not with you? If she creates all these doubts in your mind, then she is not the one! A good woman will not put you through those paces, my lady actually answers my phone and checks mine more than I check hers......as a massage therapist, I guess she always thinks I have female clients with ideas other than a massage, so I try to put her at ease when it comes to that......jajaja. A woman who cares about you will do whatever is necessary to put you at ease, and if she does not care enough to accommodate those concerns, then ditch her fast!   may I ask the age difference between you both? That sometimes is a major factor, not always, but it does factor in. I would spend more time on the Island and meet a nice woman face to face not online.,,,,heck my lady told me upon trying to pick her up that she was not interested in dating tourists, but as a good old persistent New Yorker, I got her to change her mind

Ok I am going to throw up now...  Can't believe this conversation still has life, good sex or not

Bob K

Hey Massagewhiz  I'm six years older than her.  After that fiasco she posted our photo together on whatsapp and there was only that one incident with her not answering the phone. But with everything else that looks bad besides going missing for five hours I am thinking it's best to let her go. Since that day she talks to me on Skype on weekends, night etc, and always answers my calls or returns them very quickly. I just don't trust her. I told her the truth about my past and that I dated a Dominican girl before. She told me she never dated an American, then later I found out she dated two, however, she claims the gringos lived there and a gringo has never came from the USA just to meet her. That does not even matter to me so I have no idea why she lied about that.  It does not excuse the lie she told me and I feel there have been many other small lies as well. I did fall for her like a dummy or perhaps, fell in lust and not love but too many red flags.

Congrats on wising up amigo!   Bueno suerte con su Nuevo chicas.   Yes, I said chicas.   Relax, have a drink, a fine one will come along.    By the way, in the 90's I fell into the same trap.  Painful yes, but I got out without any financial outlay to speak of, $300, ( US ) & I had married her!.   Breath easy, it is a new day.

Have to agree with Bob on this one and you would be wise to follow his advice!

>The message is clear like it is in 99.99% of cases similar to yours.  She most likely has multiple other boyfriends >gringo and Dominican
>RUN AWAY AS FAST AS  YOUR FAT LITTLE LEGS WILL CARRY YOU and start thinking with the BIG head.

Those of us who been around a bit, seen this kind of crap all over the world. Always recall years ago in Thailand when I used to go to local Post Office. There were tons of "bar girls" with pile of letters in their hands waiting to post them all over the world. UK, USA, Germany, France,etc  all of course addressed their "one and only lover"   and usual contents. Please come back soon my one and only one,,but please send some money at once by Western Union, my mother needs hospital.urgent...
Mmh yeah right. ...

Never ceased to amaze me how stupid some people are,, often older guys who should know better, Bit of sunshine and a beach,bit of Hanky Panky and they leave their brains at home.. they really were convinced these bar girls loved them  ,Whats the old saying "An old fool and his money"?
Some lost everything their houses, all their money and ended up back home ruined- and alone ..unbelievable.

But can happen in reverse too, when I lived in Tunisia some years back, noticed a lot of older women. many of them had young men in tow   and yes they got screwed too...in more ways than one :-)
Although it was common knowledge these guys (known locally as Love Rats) were after two things, money and a one way ticket to Europe, they still fell for it -and once there of course these women find their wonderful considerate Lover and future husband has.. ermm ..kind of disappeared after a few days.. usually with their purse and everything else not nailed down.
Aint love a wonderful thing? :-)   Think I;ll get a dog :-)

Wow,  listen to these guys.  They get it.  Darlin you need to run and run fast.  You are getting conned. Most of what she is telling you is one big LIE!!!! 

Dump her and move on.

You said the key word amigo........Trust!!!! If there is no trust, then there is nada! As far as not asking you for money, sometimes they will hold off on that as to not scare you off, then eventually reel you in for the big pay day! Like Gypsy and Bob said....let that one go, have a beer, and enjoy the chicas. Go with your gut feeling, if she will lie about little things, she will lie about the bigger stuff as well.

MASSAGEWIZ I could not have said it better myself.  gypsy401 - Thanks amigo! Everyone else thank you for posting responses to my questions and sharing your own personal experience. This has been very enlightening to know that I am not being paranoid as she says I am. Thanks to you all I really appreciate it. I'm moving on from this and on to bigger and better things. Thanks again.

Moving on to better things sounds good

Good luck on your adventure

Bob K

Just another word of warning,  birth control pills do NOT stop sexually transmitted diseases.  And they are rampant here including HIV and Aids my friends.....

So true planner. I've used them witout fail for the last 40 years, even when I was married.  Already had a grown son, didn't want any more kids or possible diseases.  No raincoat, no sex.   same with no cedula, no relationship of any kind.   Never can win a she said, I said  confrontation.  Certainly not in the DR.   There are some other things to be aware of.  YOU always dispose of the used item by flushing it down the commode, ALWAYS.  Yes I'm using a raised voice for emphasis.  ( not yelling ).

The golden rule here is to keep strong boundaries with any woman until you're 100% she's not a scammer. That entails dating her at safe distance for many months if not more until you can judge her character properly. Dating at safe distance means: using condoms, not letting her stay at your house, not agreeing to pay for her expenses except for small things here and there.

NEVER let any woman (or any person actually) know how much money you have. Acting like you're poorer than you truly are would be best.

For Dominicans, all gringos are rich. By their standards we are, but they can suck you dry pretty fast. Don't forget also that as soon as you are living permanently with a lady, in the local culture you are "casado". That means you must take care of all financial needs your lady may have. That implies much more than feeding her with pollo guisado, guineo and rice twice a day. Soon enough you may find yourself being asked to pay her medical bills, studies and what not. Will you leave your beloved girlfriend uninsured for health? Nooo, you have a heart don't you? So you'll insure her. Then her mom, dad, sisters, brothers and children if she has some.

On top of that, if anyone in her relatives needs to pay for medical care, dental care, glasses, car and house repair, school fees, etc. you'll be the one being asked to take the tab. Remember: Dominicans have LOTS of close relatives. You're only one "rich" gringo against one hundred dirt poor people.

So if you're gonna pay for everything for everybody, at least make sure you're doing it for a woman who truly loves and respect you, and has the potential to be your wife.

Well said.  And it applies in the reverse as well,  us rich gringas need to be very aware as well.

Good post and so true

Bob K

We need more of these discussions on this site I enjoyed every word!

to the OP: it is a trap, but how sweet it is, you probably know the best...

this is NOT a monogamic culture, just remember that

Dude, you are clueless.

LOL. This is a riot!!

Interesting post. I think it's a matter of luck, a result of poor decisions, and bad choices done in life. The positive thing of this is what one can learn from it.

Individuals like this one in particular can be found everywhere, either in a 1st, 2nd and a 3rd word country with some similarities and differences, and not because I met someone untrustworthy in a particular country, I will say that everyone from that country is untrustworthy too because is unfair and unreal. The economic situation and the rampant social exclusion in DR is forcing the population in need to do those things as a form of subsistence, who really knows. Something even more regrettable is seeing individuals born in a so called developed country with all the opportunities in life opting for the easiest way of living like prostitution, white collar crime, drug trafficking and dealing, etc.

It is a common practice to highlight the social problems of the most poor societies and generalize to make us feel vainly superiors, but we avoid talking about our own social issues in our first world homeland, where racism and xenophobia is almost institutionalized, government corruption is part of the every day entertainment in Canada, aboriginal exclusion can be compared to the Apartheid in South Africa. Also if we really want to know the real difference between settlers and invaders we must hear what the Aborigines have to say about the land they lost because of our predecessors.

I have been lucky enough to meet great people in D.R. with many good qualities. The present life we are living is the result of the decisions we have taken in the past. Who am I to judge?

All the best 

google the words neurotic, insecure, unromantic,stingy and naïve

This girl deserves a real man

Partner, first you have  to understand that you  are in the land of the  "haves and have not's." As American men, lots of Dominican women will say or do anything for you to believe you are their one and only love. I'm am not saying that there aren't some really good women in this country, but I have found that more and more women have found that it is easy to do what I call the "short con" than to be in a committed relationship with you. I have found that some women here have made it a business to have 3 or 4 foreigners to support them and their families and have their real boyfriend in the Dominican Republic. I found myself have twice the women respond to me when I  lived in the United States than I have living here now. That tells me they are worried about the chance that I can visit and find out what they are really about. So my friend my advice to you is too use your intuition and go with your gut instinct. If you feel  something is wrong, then there is a good chance that it is. Good luck

Hello, I've been spending a lot of time here over the last 6 years and I had a Dominican girlfriend for 3 years and that didn't go very well. Trust your instincts, if she's lying to you when you are there, what's happening when your not there? The vast majority of Dominican girls think gringos are walking bank machines, ever need to Boca Chica or Sosua? Girls from all over the country are weekend prostitues, for them it's easy money, if your not giving your girl money, she's getting it somewhere...

Hey frost bite, I will have to disagree when you say that girls from all over the country are prostitutes because it's definitely not true, or would you like someone to say that ALL foreigners like you living in the country are pedophiles? Just saying..

There are places like Boca Chica and Sosua in all Canada's Province and the U.S. too

yes it is that bad and worse they are trained from birth how to lie and take money they all have several phones and boyfriends, we who live here know all the stories, mama is sick, baby is sick, grandmother died, brother died, no minutes etc. but all have money for salons, hair, nails clothing etc. they use newbies and will always use them best just enjoy the ride and dont send money

Ok probably enough of this beaten to death topic.  My little head is getting a headache from this already

BObK

Dude, I didn't say all the girls here are prostitues, I said girls come from all over the country, on the weekends to try to get some easy money, I have met many wonderful ladies here that are not in the game, however, many of the prostitues are students or have boyfriends and some are even married, just try to take there picture and you will see, lots of part time and full time chicas in this country. Some of the girls don't want to work and enjoy the party life style, many of them are uneducated and can't find work, but the vast majority of the " chicas " are the main read winners of the family, they don't have a lot of options.

How is san juan de la maguana to live? My friend is from there and would like to visit sometime.

Hola como va everyone has valid points. My humble heart felt take is you don't really lose the girl oft times you just lose your turn. Please read "Ëverything you needed to know in life you learned in Kindergarten."  Wonder is not good. Also read  "Teachings on Love." As the saying goes,  "It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all". Chalk this one up to EXPERIENCE.  There are also two songs I implore you to listen to as well, 1. The World is Filled with Pimps and Whor.., I'll only Talk about those I Knows. and,  2. Give Me One More Chance. Both songs are by Biggie. Basically keep it moving. In the end try your best to answer at one point in your travels and experiences, Is She/He in your Corner and Does She/He have your Back. I say this for the women as well. My sisters married DOMINICAN Men and it was Disastorous. As to this particular situation I am going to have to say NEXT. Please practice SAFE SEX. Health is Wealth. In parting "Breathe Easy and Laugh a Lot." Ciao all love.