To marry or not to marry? that's the question

Hey, what is it so difficult? You don wanna marry so dont marry. If you wanna know another opinion see if mine is useful for you. Marriage has no meaning. Relationship has meaning. If you don have time for relationship either.... it means you have other more important things in life... you may wish to just get a rent paying room mate with benefits. The wonderful thing about choosing your own path in life is that you then never have to regret, no matter what happens. If you look at the options both of them require sacrifices and both of them have good parts. Therefore it is only up to your private preferences inside. If you get married you hardly can enjoy the benefits of unmarried life and if you are unmarried...it is harder to have the married life benefits. Think, choose, never regret. That is all.
Ah, and another thing - it is important to see that you respect and are fair to the people in your life whatever your choice and life style.

all people in this life have problems ..the difference is when u r single u will feel all the weight of the problem but when u r married there is someone who will carry this weight with u...

That is true!

yamama wrote:

all people in this life have problems ..the difference is when u r single u will feel all the weight of the problem but when u r married there is someone who will carry this weight with u...

It is very true. One plus point for marriage/relationship. It is always good to come home to someone who loves you or at least does not hate you and not want to abuse you in any way, but is just happy you are there. Home can be like Heaven if you respect one another.

also trust me later when u will have kids ur life will change complatly ...u will have a different way to think... its really nice ...

I  strongly disagree with that. I've been abroad for 4.5 years by myself. With no friends and no family and yet i was able to solve my problems one by one. Furthermore what about married people? Do they seem to solve their own problems? Infedility, trust issues, divorce...to name few?

At the end it will be our own decision . If we are convinced on our perspectives in life then that will be the path of our life's story. There are people destined to be single ( by fate or strong choice) but are able to celebrate life.

I feel you are a keen observer of life The Loner, and you have made your choice at the moment. But just dont close your doors for whatever possibilities. The most important thing in life is contentment, happiness and reasons to celebrate and be thankful and i believe you have that.

Just dont forget to share your life's passion to the world!

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

- but hatred of women is very popular.

Why do you have this opinion?

OliverQuest wrote:

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

- but hatred of women is very popular.

Why do you have this opinion?

they only hate you if they love you enough.

Hi Mr. Loner,

  Your still young and for the man there is no problem, base on my experience , even the man get older he can find a partner in life ,unlike the lady if she become old , it's hard for her to find a real man tobe in her life.
You dont have to woory. Enjoy life and it would come in time.

Cheers,

Advisor.

I believe women can be so much more beautiful as they learn from life and comprehend the true priorities life holds. We are so much more than the "beauty of our youth" because true beauty is wrapped in the soul....as a woman I value myself regardless of age because the lessons I've learned through experience are of great value. I think it is an antiquated belief that women are not valued by men after they reach a certain age. Most men would prefer a woman of real substance over anything...the old expression "age is just a number" holds great merit. As women, we need to celebrate where we are, who we are, at every age. I refuse to be defined by any stereotypical labels some may chose to believe. My hope is that all women would redefine who we truly are.

Hey, i am a woman too and i know it is true the substance and experience of a woman holds great value. Yet just imagine a young pretty woman with the experience of an elder one. I guess it is the ideal thing for men. So stop teaching men to go for less than ideal woman and making them feel guilty if they do it. Better we should aim to maintain youth while gathering experience.It is our duty to do our best in maintaining youth, beauty and experience at all age, throughout our lives. This is so that we avoid reaching the stage when we see a man attracted by a better woman and considering him to be immoral or seeing a beautiful, experienced young woman who knows how to value her skills and considering her to be immoral. A human being has to be strong inside to see where he or she can be better instead of blaming others. And it is also true that for every one at every stage there is at least one matching human being. So no need to be afraid of progressing! Right? Any beginning is supposed to have an end and an end can bring a new beginning.

While I respect your opinion here I am saying essentially that true "beauty" is far more than just a pretty face. While these things are great how many women just focus on "priming" the exterioe and never seek inward beauty. Physical beauty is subject to change...in everyone, both male and female. Yet, beauty from a true heart never fades. I know for myself, I excersize and always maintain what I've been blessed with outwardly, but my true focus is always so much deeper. I see many young women with no self respect or low self esteem or who have no value system they can rely on, so are they deemed more beautiful in society than a woman possibly 20 years older who still has outward beauty.....yet has great confidence in her abilities and value in this world?   I believe a shallow man seeks only the physical, but a real man with intelligence and a strong moral compass will seek something even more valuable.

This is evident to me by seeing so many men that marry "older" women because she has within her characters he obviously loves and values. I also see many men deemed "good looking" by sociatial standards that marry women less "beautiful" than themselves...this shows me that many men have the intelligence to see much more than just outward traits in a woman..I applaud all those that defy stereotypical agendas put on us by the media. Obviously, if the masses keep following the hidden agendas then it is more money in the bank accounts of an already billion dollar industry.

Yep, i guess men and women both have this sort of thing inside that they know what is best for them. Beauty expresses itself in many ways. Body, Mind, Intellect, Personality and everything that these include. This is actually a quote from an eastern spiritual teaching based on conclusions that existed long before the mass media. The Mass Media just to offers us another opinion and we are free to know the truth irrespective of their suggestions. I like to believe that just as the media has developed new ways of suggestions so the population has evolved new ways of recognizing the truth. I really believe in the power of the truth within each human being. Though I donŽt speak much about it, my each breath and each second of life I have this happiness that somehow someway truth prevails in every human being no matter what. People are so beautiful .... in their full potential.

faithandHope wrote:

(Can men disrespect their own Mother or sisters?)

Very much so.  The people who say all women are money grubbing whores either don't think much of their own mothers or are oblivious.

mas fred wrote:

How many men does it take to make a cup of coffee?



None - It's women's work.

haggishunter wrote:

You better hide bud

faithandHope wrote:

Very funny...but I come here in peace, no need tor anyone to hide. I just prefer respectful comments to anything I may post here. Respect is, after all the "high road."

I think Haggis was responding to Fred's comment.

OliverQuest wrote:

Why do you have this opinion?

I read posts.

faithandHope wrote:

I believe women can be so much more beautiful as they learn from life and comprehend the true priorities life holds. We are so much more than the "beauty of our youth" because true beauty is wrapped in the soul....as a woman I value myself regardless of age because the lessons I've learned through experience are of great value. I think it is an antiquated belief that women are not valued by men after they reach a certain age. Most men would prefer a woman of real substance over anything...the old expression "age is just a number" holds great merit. As women, we need to celebrate where we are, who we are, at every age. I refuse to be defined by any stereotypical labels some may chose to believe. My hope is that all women would redefine who we truly are.

These are nice dreams, but not of the world we are living in right now: The vast majority of men (and women, too, in a very different way) are governed by hormones that are triggered by a nice, young body - and not by a mature mind! Thus what you said above will not and cannot become true.

Thankfully I have both....

beppi wrote:

faithandHope wrote:

I believe women can be so much more beautiful as they learn from life and comprehend the true priorities life holds. We are so much more than the "beauty of our youth" because true beauty is wrapped in the soul....as a woman I value myself regardless of age because the lessons I've learned through experience are of great value. I think it is an antiquated belief that women are not valued by men after they reach a certain age. Most men would prefer a woman of real substance over anything...the old expression "age is just a number" holds great merit. As women, we need to celebrate where we are, who we are, at every age. I refuse to be defined by any stereotypical labels some may chose to believe. My hope is that all women would redefine who we truly are.

These are nice dreams, but not of the world we are living in right now: The vast majority of men (and women, too, in a very different way) are governed by hormones that are triggered by a nice, young body - and not by a mature mind! Thus what you said above will not and cannot become true.

As long as there are still many & many cultures/countries to explore in this world we are living in right now, therefore, absolute/very certain opinions don't exist and words like (will not and cannot become true) don't make any sense.

Yes Mo...I couldn't agree with you more. If someone thinks in simplistic ways then they are unaware that many actually have a much more mature way of thinking. I have observed many in varying cultures at a young age that seek so much more from life.

faithandHope wrote:

Thankfully I have both....

Boasting about yourself will make you look superficial and shallow.

Yes, you're right. Men need to treat women with as much respect as their own Mothers receive...of course we women need to do the same..

Possibly..I wasn't sure since I can't always see the whole thread on my phone so I thought Id throw out my comment just incase..

I was responding to a comment I deemed disrespectful to women. There is a distinct difference between being"superficial" and being confident....the 1st comes from viewing ourselves only outwardly but confidence is understanding who we are. If you read the entire conversation I'm sure you will have a better grasp on everything I said.

Hey dude and gals,

As I am reading all your comments and opinions I am learning something. Allow me to share with you my ideas also. In your subject matter on getting married. In my own view, to get married is a matter of choice and will. We as human was designed by our Creatot in a unique way. We have needs that we need to satisfy, the spiritual and physical. In physical needs a normal person need to satisfy his lust, in a moderate and responsible way, while his spiritual needs his soul and spirit needs constant fellowship and connection with his Creator. It is your choice and once chosen your will, will put it into practice.

To the Loner, I reckon that you still haven't met that girl who will turn your world around, In my case I wasn't even looking for love but just when I expected the least she appeared out of nowhere like an angel in the midst of  confusing asian streets. Eventually she became my wife.

OliverQuest wrote:

To the Loner, I reckon that you still haven't met that girl who will turn your world around, In my case I wasn't even looking for love but just when I expected the least she appeared out of nowhere like an angel in the midst of  confusing asian streets. Eventually she became my wife.

That might be true.  Or maybe he just doesn't want to get married.  Not everybody has to do the same thing.

Trust me it's never a decision to be made, it's a kind of a fate.

Click - Relationship - Marriage

Hey Loner what do you think of women?

I know nothing about them but based on my observation I'd say that: they use their sexuality to get what they want(especially the attractive ones) they use layers of make-up and dress in very tight clothes it seems like it's chocking them.They are materialistic lunatics They are always the victims who think that they are not accountable for their actions some have been brainwashed  by feminist lunatics if your are shocked chances are you've been brainwashed too.
I don't approach them or try to socialise with them but curiously they don't approach me either. Naturally I enjoy being alone.

I dont wear layets of makeup, nor tight clothing. I was not looking for a man when i found him......He is now my husdand.

Loner plz dont tar all women like the ones you have seen.
I am not one of thoes

I was married for 38 years of my life and my wife passed away a few years ago and i have decided i want to spend the rest of my life single. 

                                  David1946

Hi Mr.David,

Maybe you could say that to remain single ,if you are happy and your kids spent so much time with you have regular communication with you, maybe you will not feel bored in your life,but in spite of it you may feel he longingnes for companion, based on my experience as a single,there are times that you feel longingnes,being alone.It's seem that my life has no direction.
Anyway sorry im being melancholic.
I hope we could just be friend.

More power and God bless,

Phoebe

m Filipina nationality but currently working in Abroad. Im 43 years old but does not look at my face.During my day off i spent most of my time in computer, giving time taking care myself such as doing work out, doing facial, browsing from internet, chatting, cooking these are my daily routine life in Kabul Afghanistan, since we are not allowed to go somewhere and there is no nice place as well to go for roaming around. I tried to spend my time in fullest , as human  i can't avoid to feel the loneliness, longingsness for someone to be with him, I could rate myself as average person but  my relationship was always failed,  i would rather choose to be alone but sometimes i can't resist the feeling of longiness to someone, a companionship..
I wish someday i could meet the man who is real man with clear heart.I wish i could meet my compatible man someday.

Hi i i have girlfriends that spend time with me and i walk for excercise and do a little workout everyday work around my place i can find as much as i want to do so i dont feel lonliness very often.           

                                 Have a nice day
                                           David

The Loner wrote:

I'm getting closer to the age of 30,it's time to make important decisions in life and one of them is finding a wife.
I've never had a female friend, let alone a girlfriend,
And i know nothing about them but I've been observing closer friends and men who are either engaged or have girlfriend and it seems like that i'm happier, wealthier, fitter and less stressed than them ! I came to the realization that i don't want the burdensome weights of a relationship i don't have time for this triviality my life is short.

marry if you want, not to marry if you dont, whatever you think will makes you more happier then go for it.

I would never give up on women, They are so pretty, their skin is so smooth and it feels good when you are caressing them but I just wish they were able to shut up every once in a while...